Phil mcgraw quotes

It's so much easier to tell people what they want to hear instead of what they need to hear.

People who consistently win have a clear and thoughtful strategy. They know what they need to do and when they need to do it. They write it down so they stay on course, and avoid any alternative that does not get them closer to the finish line.

Life Is Managed; It Is Not Cured.

Willpower is a myth. The problem with trying to use willpower to achieve and sustain a behavioral change is that it is fueled by emotion. And as we all know, our emotions are, at best, fickle. They come and go. When your emotions start running down -- and they will -- even your best-laid plans will fall flat.

I think every parent, every generation has wanted their children to do better and have a higher standard of living. But I think there's too much guilt.

Eighty percent of all questions are statements in disguise.

This is no dress rehearsal.

At the end of the day, whether or not those people are comfortable with how you're living your life doesn't matter. What matters is whether you're comfortable with it.

You can't change what you don't acknowledge.

Stand up and walk out of your history

Success means different things in different parts of my life, but overall if I have to define ultimately what success means - the bottom line - then for me it's if the family is healthy and happy.

People create their own experiences.

Unless you know who you are, you will always be vulnerable to what people say.

You have got to decide, look, this is who I am; this is my best way to present myself, and I'm going to ride that horse to the finish line. Not everybody will like it, but that's OK.

Happiness isn't a one-size-fits-all proposition. You must define what it looks like for you and then make a conscious effort to access whatever gets you to your unique definition of joy.

Why do so many marriages fail? Because nobody gets taught how to be married. We're not taught how to pick a mate, or why to pick a mate; we don't know how to manage our emotions once we're in a marriage; we don't know how to resolve marital conflict. Married people have never been taught why they or their spouses feel the way they do and act the way they do. Nobody has ever taught us the fundamentals.

In life you have three options with any situation that is a challenge. Remove yourself from the situation, change it, or accept it.

Common sense needs to be more common.

We all have a social mask, right? We put it on, we go out, put our best foot forward, our best image. But behind that social mask is a personal truth, what we really, really believe about who we are and what we're capable of.

Be your authentic self. Your authentic self is who you are when you have no fear of judgment, or before the world starts pushing you around and telling you who you're supposed to be. Your fictional self is who you are when you have a social mask on to please everyone else. Give yourself permission to be your authentic self.

The difference between winners and losers is that winners do things losers don't want to do.

You cannot be who and what you are unless you have a lifestyle, both internally and externally, that is designed to support that definition of self.

Are you doing what you're doing today because you want to do it, or because it's what you were doing yesterday?

I grew up in athletics, where people keep score.

You need to face the pain and the fear and walk through the Grief.

Right now, make a list of what you admire about yourself- don't stop until you've filled a page. Sit and relish each quality and accomplishment. When you remember how much you have to be proud of, you don't need to envy others. Instead of wallowing in your jealousy, use your friends' accomplishments as inspiration to pursue the life you want.

I just am not good at math.

When you get married, your loyalty, first and foremost, is to your spouse, and to the family that you create together.

If you need a miracle, be a miracle.

I've learned a tremendous amount from Oprah.

If you marry for money you will earn every penny.

Most choices are driven by immediate results.

People who have nothing to hide, hide nothing. You should be an open book, be transparent.

Leaders inspire. They aren't assigned leadership. They command it.

Life's managed, not cured.

Instead of being ashamed of what you've been through, be proud of what you have overcome!

I've talked to so many people, men and women alike, that get overweight and their self-esteem just goes in the tank. They think they're judged. They think they're unattractive.

Pain is the price you pay for resisting life.

Awareness without action is worthless.

You know, what we do know is that there is a high frequency of violence in the home of those who bully.

Food is a coping mechanism; people are afraid of giving it up because then they'll feel confused and lost.

Well, let me tell you, if you're 45, had three children and are post-menopausal, you're not going to weigh what you did the day you graduated from high school. Get that out of your head. That's a media-driven ideal that you're never going to healthfully obtain.

This is your life and the clock is ticking.

You're only lonely if you're not there for you.

You can't put feathers on a dog and call it a chicken!

At this very moment, you may be saying to yourself that you have any number of admirable qualities. You are a loyal friend, a caring person, someone who is smart, dependable, fun to be around. That's wonderful, and I'm happy for you, but let me ask you this: are you being any of those things to yourself?

Everybody should have the opportunity to do and be everything they can be.

You don't need a pack of wild horses to learn how to make a sandwich.

You get what you ask for in this life. If you ask for nothing, you get nothing.

You are your own most important resource for making your life work. Life rewards action. Until your knowledge, awareness, insights, and understandings are translated into action, they are of no value.

I'm one of those that believes you can't be one kind of a man and another kind of president.

It's hard to see your own face without a mirror.

If you don't have a plan, days turn into weeks, weeks turn into months, months turn into years, and before you know it you're looking back saying, I should've had a plan.

My dad used to say, 'You wouldn't worry so much about what people thought about you if you knew how seldom they did.

A lot of people do have tragic childhoods. But you know what? Get over it.

Those who marry for money end up EARNING it anyway.

Anger is nothing more than an outward expression of hurt, fear and frustration

Every one of us have things that we believe about ourselves when nobody else is looking, nobody else is listening, nobody else is monitoring what we're doing. We believe things about ourselves.

Relationships are negotiated and if you deal with ultimatums and authority all the time, then you're not going to get anywhere.

Learn when's a good time to shut up

Some people prefer the passenger role, because it imposes no real pressure to decide or stand accountable for their life results.

There is nothing wrong with your marriage if you're dealing with bills and kids and the broken garbage disposal and in-laws and work demands. That's a normal marriage.

Loving smart means believing in you, your worth and your value.

Like an enemy I knew as intimately as any friend, I came to know the nagging, constant emptiness of the incongruent life. I ignored myself and lived for people, purposes, and goals that weren't my own. I betrayed who I was and instead accepted a fictional substitute that was defined from the outside in.

Reality check: you can never, ever, use weight loss to solve problems that are not related to your weight. At your goal weight or not, you still have to live with yourself and deal with your problems. You will still have the same husband, the same job, the same kids, and the same life. Losing weight is not a cure for life.

The most you get is what you ask for.

Life’s a marathon, not a sprint.

I'm embarrassed every time I look a teacher in the eye, because we ask them to do so much for so little.

People say time heals all wounds. Let me tell you, time heals nothing. You can do the wrong thing for 10 years and it doesn't equal the right thing for one day.

Effective negotiators have a style that those whom they are trying to influence, relate to and admire.

I think I've got the best staff in television.

If your neighbor has a completely different view on abortion, gay marriage, stem cell research, all of those things, you still are both Americans. Neither one of you is necessarily more patriotic than the other. Neither loves their country any more than the other one does.

You should consider an employment change before you consider selling out.

Champions get what they want because they know what they want. They have a vision that keeps them motivated and efficiently on track. They see it, feel it, and experience it in their minds and hearts. What is success for you? You won't get there without knowing what it feels and looks like.

You either get it or you don't. Become one of those who get it.

Eighty percent of all choices are based on fear. Most people don't choose what they want; they choose what they think is safe.

You do not HAVE to be angry just because you have the right to be angry.

Everyone faces the challenge of finding meaning to their suffering.

Life is a full-contact sport, and there's a score up on the board.

If what you're doing isn't working, change it.

You have to name it to claim it

People have the right to think and say whatever they want to. But you have the right not to take it to heart, and not to react.

There has never been a merging of two lives where significant problems of daily living did not occur. One way or another, your relationship is going to be affected. The only question is how. There's a big difference between knowing and doing. It's not what happens between partners that determines the outcome of a relationship, it's how they handle what happens. If all you deal with in your relationship is problems, then you will have a problem relationship. If you want your pound of flesh with full acknowledgement that you're right, your future will be dim.

Grief is a process to go through, not a destination in which to wallow. In a process, you keep putting one foot in front of the other, and each little step is part of your healing.

I tell you, if you're in the front row of the parade and you stop walking, pretty soon you're back in the tuba section. And if you want to lead the parade you've got to keep moving.

There are some sick people in this world.

The truth doesn't have versions, it just is.

There is no reality, only perception.

When you allow a person's words to upset you, you're giving away your power.

It's better to be healthy alone than sick with someone else.

Do you realize that you can't play the game of life with sweaty palms?

Take it from a guy: If you're in love with somebody, you will swim the stream, you will climb the mountain, you will slay the dragon. You're going to get to her somehow, some way.

Oh, everybody wears a mask. We all put our best foot forward. We all try and make a statement, I'm not saying that's bad.

The Internet is just bringing all kinds of information into the home. There's just a lot of distraction, a lot of competition for the parent's voice to resonate in the children's ears.

Know your goal, make a plan and pull the trigger

You have to figure out what that is, and you have to make a plan to get to it. And the plan has got to have a timeline. You have to choose something that you can afford to do and then lock it in and passionately do it.

If you don't know what it is you want - and I mean specifically - then you won't even know when you have it.

We teach people how to treat us.

Do it! People who succeed don't just sit and think about what they want to do. They take meaningful, purposeful, directional action consistently and persistently. Every step they take puts them toward the outcome they're looking for.

Anyone can do something when they want to do it. Really successful people do things when they don't want to do it.

Successful weight loss takes programming, not willpower.

There is power in forgiveness.

You need to listen to your body because your body is listening to you.

I do not believe, even remotely, that you have to have a partner in your life in order to be whole, in order to be complete, in order to be fulfilled. You just don't have to.

I mean, if you degrade someone, you isolate them, you control them, you call them names, you demean them. That's a horrible existence for people.

Men fall in love with their eyes. Women fall in love with their ears.

You don't need a rope to pinch a stranger's butt.

Think about all of the times, situations, and circumstances where you have gotten caught up in making your self right rather than happy... The harder you fight to win, the bigger you lose.

If you want more, you have to require more from yourself.

There is an interconnectedness among members that bonds the family, much like mountain climbers who rope themselves together when climbing a mountain, so that if someone should slip or need support, he's held up by the others until he regains his footing.

Change can come in either of two important ways: Start behaving positively or stop behaving negatively.

Sometimes you just got to give yourself what you wish someone else would give you.

If you're trying to get out of debt, you have to be willing to treat everything as expendable.

I think you're running into a lot of trouble if your idea of foreplay is, 'Brace yourself honey, here I come!'

Well, I'm not sure what pop psychology is, but I don't like it.

Don't wait until you're in a crisis to come up with a crisis plan.

The number one need in all people is the need for acceptance, the need to experience a sense of belonging to something and someone. The need for acceptance is more powerful in your family than anywhere else.... If that need is not met by your family, trust me, your kids will go elsewhere to seek it in order to find approval and acceptance.

If I was on the air and was just kind of a plain-vanilla personality that took the safe road and the safe way trying to please all of the people all of the time, I'd been gone in two weeks.

A year from now, you're gonna weigh more or less than what you do right now.

A mother is only as happy as her saddest child.

Take the high road, there's a lot less traffic up there.

You must demand nothing less than the best of yourself and for yourself. You must tell yourself that it is not wrong to want it all.

There's a big difference between falling in love and being in love. There's a big difference between infatuation and falling in love.

Life is not a success only journey.

Sometimes you make the right decision, sometimes you make the decision right.