Mary j. blige quotes

I used to think I was ugly. I thought I looked like a camel. A person who doesn't love themselves, they will see anything that pops up on their face. I've seen squirrels, I've seen a bird, and I've seen all kinds of animals on my face. But that is the result of self-hate. I've learned to say: 'You know what? I am a beautiful black woman'.

The only person that I'm really feeling - because she has an identity of her own, even though she has listened to Mary J. Blige - is Jill Scott.

I've been a tomboy my whole life. But then you get older, you get married, you soften up.

Don't give up, be positive and if you know someone who knows someone at a record company don't stop beating down their door till you get heard. Don't ever say it'll never happen or it'll never happen.

When you tell your truth, you are coming from a real place, so you are automatically a leader.

When you're going to do whatever you're going to do, you have to get your, put your mind into it.

You can hate me. You can go out there and say anything you want about me, But you will love me later because I told you the truth.

There are people out there who want to provoke me and bring back the old Mary but I'm not giving them the satisfaction.

I'm a child of God. God is my mommy, my daddy. That's the only thing that'll keep my head up. If I don't remember who I am in him, I'm done.

When you hold on to anger and unforgiveness, you can't move forward.

God comes first - if I don't love him, I can't love anybody, and if I can't love me I can't love nobody.

I remember a time when all my fans were crying and sad and going through hell. Now, we're trying to uplift each other and accept ourselves for who we are, even if nobody else does.

I believe there are certain things that God uses to get us out of a bad situation, and I believe music was one of the things he used for me.

I like hanging out with me, and I've accepted everything about me good, bad whatever it is. That's why I'm able to, that's why no one can tell me anything negative about myself.

Negative words are powerful boomerangs so be careful what you say about people and yourself.

I don't know. Only God knows where the story ends for me, but I know where the story begins. It's up to us to choose, whether we win or lose and I choose to win.

We are all spirits. We get depressed. But music makes you want to live. I know my music has saved my life.

You demand respect and you'll get it. First of all, you give respect.

Once you climb to another level, you have to figure out how to sustain it.

I've learned so much from all my mistakes. I just wish I had gotten my education.

In your life there's peaks and valleys and sometimes we regress, and we don't even know we regress. You just have to learn how to accept all of your mistakes and learn to love yourself again.

We are all just a work in progress.

I wouldn't adopt, but what I will do is give my time and go and try to be there for people.

It's not just songs and glamour. It's sweat, blood, broken toes, and mistakes... It's life.

You can look at my palm and see the storm coming. Read the book of my life and see I've overcome it.

I mean, I know my heart is not clean, and your heart is not clean, and none of our urban hearts are clean. But you can be washed again.

I'm striving toward this acting thing. I'm definitely gonna work hard on that, whatever comes my way, I'm gonna work hard on it.

I like what I see when I'm looking at me when I'm walking past the mirror.

I had to learn how to trust my gut. Trust what I know to be right... not right, but not waver on who I am. Know who I am, know what I want, and know it. Not waver on it and be secure in that. And I still struggle with it. But I really... I can't be moved. You can't move me, and that all comes with loving myself, and I'm like my best buddy.

I’ve done well, I’ve been disappointed, and I think it all goes back to you. Of course the labels are going to be the labels. It’s the music business. You are a business. That’s what they do. So you’ve got to protect yourself.

My responsibility to God is to live. That's the gift he gave me. What I do with it is up to me.

So as long as I'm a human being and I'm not perfect, I'm able to say I'm having some growing pains. Because in order to sustain where you are once you made such a breakthrough that everyone is looking at you, now everyone is like, 'Ooh, is she gonna make a mistake?' Yes, I'm going to make a mistake. Yes, I'm still gonna do things.

People in my neighborhood inspired me to sing. Believe in your ability no matter what, but be realistic with yourself and your ability.

I don't want no drama in my life, even though we have a little bit, but no more letting people control you. That's drama, because then you become something that you're not.

I think everyone should understand history of segregation the same way we had to go to school and read about George Washington. I believe this generation should know their history and they should know that the struggle's not over yet. For instance, you can't get the cover of a magazine if your skin is too dark.

I'm on my way to a place where I'd never dreamed I'd be, and that's perfection.

As far as men go, they never gave me a chance to be me; they were always scared that somebody was going to take me.

I'm hoping that my entrepreneurial side will have me at a place where I don't have to do anything. That's what I'm striving for.

There's so many things that life is, and no matter how many breakthroughs, trials will exist and we're going to get through it. Just be strong.

As a kid, I dreamed about being onstage.

It's OK showing yourself some love.

My journey continues, because I've, you know, conquered a lot. And I know how to conquer the rest.

Nowadays, with the state of the music business, for any artist, whether you're up-and-coming or you've been in it for awhile, you have to explore different revenues and different ways of expressing yourself.

I don't listen to people's opinions. I have people around me who I can trust, but most of all I listen to myself.

It's sad that a lot of identities are lost and a lot of careers are lost because there's sort of a clone thing going on.

Working in the studio is a more personal experience whereas on stage in front of a billion people, its more exciting performing live.

I'm searching for a real love.

I'm from the element of the streets that says that once you've made it, it's yours. But keep it to yourself.

I've just been growing right along. It's painful, but it's a great pain, and I like suffering for great results. It's like going to the gym. It hurts really bad at first, but after a couple of months and after that diet, you're looking so hot.

There's not enough time to be disrespecting... Life is too short.

I do consider myself part of black history.

I wish I had known that education is the key. That knowledge is power. Now I pick up books and watch educational shows with my husband. I'm seeing how knowledge can elevate you.

I wish I had an extra day with my mom sometimes. Or another hour in the day with my family, husband and children.

This music business can suck all the love out of you, all the compassion for people - you can start to think you're better than them. But I want to continue to let people know that I'm no better and no worse, I'm just like you.

God loves me and sent his son to die for me so I have to live to please him because he saved me when everyone abandoned me.

I decided to start my own label because so many people with talent come to me wanting to know how they can get in the music business.

...I would be a liar and my fans would hate me if I said to them, 'Oh, we're perfect and everything is great.' We have situations just like everyone else. We're not out in public trying to kill each other, but it's real. We love each other.

I believe there should be no more drama, but it's everywhere you go. It's just about how you get out. You've gotta bob and weave because it's everywhere. How do I keep the drama low? It's about using your head.

Cause I'm no better than you, you, or you. And I can't get on no throne and preach, 'cause I'm not God.

I believe that anything man himself can do for me, God can do for me in a greater way. I decided to pray and to seek God on my own. I just stayed in The Word. And it worked.

If you're here right now in your life, your journey continues and you've lived to tell the story.

As a child I always wanted to be a singer. The music my mother played in the house moved me - Aretha Franklin, Chaka Khan, Mahalia Jackson. It was truly spiritual. It made you understand what God was. We are all spirits. We get depressed. But music makes you want to live. I know my music has saved my life.

When I was a kid, I needed to sing because it makes me feel good about myself. It makes me feel good, period.

I didn't never have to go to a therapist. I just always put it in a song and you heard me.

Thank you so much for supporting me from the day I stepped foot into the music industry. It really means something to me to have Maya Angelou speak on my behalf. It also means a lot to have Oprah on my speed dial!

You know a lot, but you don't know everything.

If we didn't have understanding of our journey, we wouldn't be able to go on. We'd be stuck, like, 'Why me?'

I was inspired to create 'My Life' so I could finally share a personal part of my life beyond my music.

It hurts when you have to smile and you don't want to smile, but the best thing to do is to smile.

You have to create different things, either through lighting or changing the format of the songs and how you're going to sing them, and even sometimes props.

I've been praying to God to show me how to forgive myself. Because... maybe... that's the thing I've been searching for.

If you're looking for inner peace from the outside world, you're not going to get that. The inner peace starts with looking at you from the inside.

I can go out raw with nothing, and my fans would still be happy, but I feel that I owe it to them to give them almost like a Broadway musical at this point in my life. I have to give them something more, so I do have to think of different ways to do it.

I know who I am. I am not perfect. I'm not the most beautiful woman in the world. But I'm one of them.

In the inner city, there's a mentality that the government owes you something. My breakthrough came when I stopped feeling sorry for myself and took responsibility for every part of my life. No more pity parties. I've gotta love me more than anybody else loves me.

I think women should band together to get us more respect in all the businesses that we're in because, you know, if we turn 40, we're nothing and nobody. We all should band together and just say we're not gonna go down like that.

If you're looking for inner peace from the outside world, you're not going to get that. The inner peace starts with looking at you from the inside. Understanding that everything that comes to you is what you are. Everything from friends to boyfriends to the job you get - it's all a direct reflection of what you are on the inside.

You have to have a plan. Everything has to be planned. For me, I start with the title of my album, before I even start with the songs. I write down different things that I want album to say, and then the songs come from the different words.

The important thing is to realize that no matter what people's opinions may be, they're only just that - people's opinions. You have to believe in your heart what you know to be true about yourself. And let that be that.

Yonkers made me strong and made me believe in myself, because so many people would doubt you and not believe. There are people that would believe in you, but the environment was so harsh, nobody wanted you to get out, you know?

Love is wonderful, amazing, and the best thing that can happen to us.

When I was five years old I was molested and just, you know. I remember feeling, literally right before it happened, I just could not believe that this person was going to do this to me. That thing followed me all my life. The shame of thinking my molestation was my fault - it led me to believe I wasn't worth anything.

Just don't let the hype of what people are saying and how much they love you, y'know, just take the compliment and be thankful that people are complimenting you, but don't let it consume you; don't let your circumstances around you and the way people view you make you act a certain way.

I barely have time for my own children. To adopt more children and not have time for them, that would be poor parenting on my part.

Music makes us want to live. You don't know how many times people have told me that they'd been down and depressed and just wanted to die. But then a special song caught their ear and that helped give them renewed strength. That's the power music has.

That's the message I want to give to every up-and-coming artist: Do everything that is going to help you later. If you clone somebody else, that's all they're gonna keep wanting from you.

It's that first step-getting out the door-that's the toughest. If you can do that, you've already won.

I just want fans to walk away knowing that no matter what's going on, no matter how happy you are, no matter how sad you are, we did it. We're strong in this. We've come a long way, and life is not just one thing.

Everything is scary if you look at it. So you just got to live.

I blame my mother for nothing, but forgive her for everything.

In the studio you can really concentrate on performing the song where as on stage you also have to worry about connecting with so many people, they're definitely different.

You either learn from your experiences or go back and do the same thing, and I learned from my experiences.

You can't get around pain and opposition, but you can try to be joyful in the trial, and thank yourself for the trial, and thank God for the strength to get through it.

For the first time in my life, I'm proud of myself

The music business is not a good place for people who don't know things.

I never do any album to beat it. I do it to extend it.

When someone comes up to me and says, 'Mary, you helped save my marriage', or, 'Mary, you helped me get out of this abusive relationship', I'm in it, really in their lives. And I'm so passionate about my feelings, but also about showing people the way through theirs.

My career doesn't get harder because when you have something to share, you have something to share. And when it's a trial or a situation that you triumph out of, you have to - because this is the relationship I started with my fans on the My Life album in 1994. You have to share in order for people to see how you came through it, or how you're dealing with having thoughts of doubting yourself. What songs are gonna help you? What lyrics are gonna pull you out of your slump?

I don't have any health problems, but to keep your health improves your quality of life.

Really, every woman is an example to me, because as women we go through so much pain. We have to live this perfect life when we are messed up inside. We all go through trials and tribulations.

I still get nervous about singing. I drink tea with honey and lemon before every concert. And I need to have scented candles in all of my hotel rooms.

As a kid, I was in love with Michael Jackson, and I just knew I was going to marry him someday.

I care about me now. When I didn't care about me, I was, like, 'Why is this going wrong? Why is my life so bad?' But when you don't care about yourself, nobody else is going to care about you. So I learned to love myself, even if nobody else does.

No one intimidates me because I'm not trying to do what you do, because I can't do what you do. I can only do what Mary J. Blige can do, so that relaxes me right there, and it gets me out of the competition and that whole thing.

Life is full of trials and tribulations. It's dramatic when you don't treat people right when you're in the tribulations, but I know now how to get out of it. You have to make a decision to say 'No more', and then you know what to do when the trials happen.

'My Life' is not an autobiography. It's just music.

When life is real, it's not going to be smooth.

The streets respect me because I kept it real with me. You gotta be real with yourself, and the streets recognize game.

I can tell you I didn't feel good when I could not articulate properly. Getting my GED was important and I want other women to feel that.

I cannot save the world, that's not what I'm trying to do. I guess I'm just trying to walk the walk and be an example to those that want it. Not everybody does, but if Mary J Blige can come out of that same hole you were in, then you can do it too - that's my goal: to do that without saying it, but actually live it.

My God is a God who wants me to have things. He wants me to bling. He wants me to be the hottest thing on the block.

No one compares to you. Just remember that. There's no one out there - there's only one of you, and that's it. And whatever you believe about you that's great, no one else has it. And I can't look like you, there's no way I can slip into your body and be you, and you can't slip into my body and be me. This is all we're gonna get.

I can't just make a song people can dance in a club to... it still has to be real.

I like to do interior design, I love to quilt, I love to see different colors together, and I love to match things up.

When you come from so many damaged places you don't ever want to spiral back there, so you gotta continue to check yourself.

I started speaking about what I was dealing with through my music, and 4 million women responded and said, 'Us too, Mary.' And I didn't know that everyone was hurting like I was hurting. I had no idea.

From being a little girl in the projects, going through all of the mess that I was going through, to ending up at the Inauguration for the first African-American president, I'm speechless right now because I never thought I'd - I never ever - I couldn't even see that far. Even when I ended up in the music business I couldn't see that.

I have to have lemon and honey. I have to have apple cider vinegar, Braggs. And I have to have either Red Vines or Twizzlers. These things, you know, are the things that help my vocal performance.

It's up to us to choose whether we win or lose...and I choose to win.

My main exercise is cardio. The treadmill is fine, but running outdoors gives me the best results. I try to log 6 to 8 miles a week. I could be in the worst mood, but when I do my cardio, I feel much, much better.

Believe in yourself when nobody else does.

Then my life crashed and burned down: trials, men, drama, no self-love, no identity. A little identity, but not a lot of love for myself, my life.

It's challenging to find an identity as a young person if you don't have the sustenance of love, because you're being shipped around.

I'm a singer who thinks like a rapper.

Growing up, I was the preferred hairstylist for all of my friends.